ALBERTAPHOBIA

One time we were motoring northward toward Blue River, which is north of Kamloops, south of Jasper.  We needed fuel, so we went into the Husky gas station.

There we saw an awful thing: a loud, ugly confrontation between an Alberta guy and a BC guy.  The BC guy was one of a group of motorcyclists who had been riding north.  The Alberta guy was driving a family vehicle with Alberta plates, obviously on his way home from vacation.  The family guy, apparently, had passed the motorcycles and cut in too soon, and when they all stopped for gas at the Husky, things got heated.

We arrived in time for the in-store segment of the discussion.  There, between the  chips and chocolate bars, the BC guy, a loutish Neanderthal,  was loudly berating the bespectacled Albertan. “You are an asshole!” he shouted.  He said many things like that.  He used the f-bomb with Neanderthal frequency, and then, as a final insult, he hollered, “All you Albertans come over here and drive like assholes!  You’re all assholes, every one of you!”  The Albertan just waited him out, then left.

Very nasty, but a once-off?  Don’t think so.  I’ve seen it in Kelowna at a boat launch: a shiny, jacked pickup with Alberta plates, putting an expensive boat into Okanagan Lake, dark murmurings about “those Albertans” circulating among the onlookers.  I’ve experienced it in Victoria, driving a friend’s black Mercedes with Alberta plates.  Once getting cursed at for stopping to drop a passenger, another time getting cut off by a diesel pickup for reasons known only to his BC self.  I could go on.

So is Alberta-phobia a thing?  Can you be an Altaphobe?  An Aphobe?

Last month, Alberta had its 15 minutes of fame, featuring Danielle and the referendum. It was all over the media, all over the world.  I am willing to bet that every Canadian, Albertan, BC’ian, or Other-ian, had more than one discussion about it.  And in those discussions, I would be willing to bet that one of the following was said: those Albertans are whiners.  Little wannabe cowboys.  Texas north.  MAGA.  Culturally stunted. Ignorant.  Bigoted. Redneck, Conservative. Obnoxious.

Sound familiar?  Albertaphobic?

We recently returned to Alberta from BC.  Come closing time, we will have spent about half of our time in one province, half in the other. I was born and raised in BC, my wife in Alberta.  Our kids live in both provinces.  So what do we think?

Well, for one thing, generalizations of that sort aren’t overly helpful most of the time. Doesn’t look like they’re too accurate either.  Beside that, what good ever came of prejudice, or tribalism, or xenophobia, or any other kind of fear or hatred?  Not so much, it would seem.  “Hate thy neighbor” has a pretty bad track record.

I would say two things.  First, the culture on one side of the Rockies is different than the culture on the other side.  I can’t exactly put my finger on it, but they are different worlds in many ways.  Seems obvious to me.

Second, neither province has a monopoly on beauty. Both are jaw droppers.

Neither province has a monopoly on ignorant drivers, or saints, or any other manifestation of good and evil.  We’re all just people.

Neither province has a monopoly on wealth or the opportunities to get wealthy.  Both are fantastically favored, wealthy jurisdictions. Western Canadians are the envy of the world, which really should make us more inclined to gratitude, less inclined to bickering, wouldn’t you say?

Which province do we prefer?  That’s a tough one, but in the end I would have to say that the endless Alberta blue sky tips the scales for me.  God’s own dome, I’m  thinking: clouds, birds, chinooks, the odd tornado. According to AI, Calgary is Canada’s sunniest major city with 333 sunny days a year.  There’s even songs about Alberta’s blue sky.  Spring Time in Alberta by Ian Tyson, if you’re wondering.

BC has oceans and mountains and all of that for sure.  They also have the sky over there, if you can see it between the trees and mountains, on whatever sunny days they have.

But here, on most days, all you gotta do is look up.  Blue from one horizon to the other.  I like that.  Think we’ll stay here.